20 THINGS I WISH I KNEW BEFORE BECOMING A PASTOR

20 THINGS I WISH I KNEW BEFORE BECOMING A PASTOR

 I came across an intriguing article written by Brandon Hilgemann.  Although many of our devotional readers are not pastors (yet many are), his perspective is beneficial for the consideration of both clergy and laity.  Although it’s rather lengthy, the entire treatise is printed below for your prayerful perusal.

 Let’s cut the fluff and get real for a moment.  Being a pastor is incredibly difficult.

 The church is often guilty of only painting a picture of the wonderful blessings of being called to ministry—like it only gets better and better, day after day.  We somehow forget to talk about the suffering involved. Did we actually forget, or are afraid people won’t go into ministry if they know the truth?

 I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but there are some things we are failing to prepare new pastors for.  There are many things I wish someone would have told the 20-year-old me.  I have spent the last decade learning most of these things the hard way:

 1.        It will be the hardest thing you ever do.  Seriously, it is really, really, really hard!  Imagine the most difficult thing you have done and multiply it by a hundred.  That may be close to how challenging ministry can be.  If you want to be a pastor because it sounds fun, glamorous, or easy, do something else.

 2.       Integrity and a love for Christ are important but insufficient.  You must be able to lead people.  Your character and love for Christ are the requirements for entry.  These are crucial and more important than anything.  However, no matter how godly you are, if you cannot lead people, you will struggle.

 3.       People may avoid you, and act weird simply because you are a pastor.  People will act one way when you are around, and another when you aren’t.  Others will avoid you because you represent God, and they feel guilty.  This is why many pastors dread the inevitable question when meeting someone new: “So, what do you do for a living?”

 4.       People will expect you to be available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.  You will get midnight phone calls and texts.  Some will be urgent; others can wait.  You must set boundaries in your schedule because a pastor’s job is never finished.

 5.       Workaholism will be rewarded, but it can destroy your family.  Pastors who work too much get praises and raises…until their family falls apart.  Then we pity them.  All too often, we must choose between doing ministry and being around our families.

 6.       When people stop attending your church, it will hurt.  No matter how awesome you are, some people will leave.  It is inevitable.  It may have nothing to do with you, but it will always feel personal.

 7.       You must fight the urge to compare your ministry to other churches.  You will always lose in the comparison game.  If you compare yourself to a smaller church, you will feel pride.  If you compare yourself to a larger church, you will feel envy.  Both are sinful.

 8.       Attacks from inside your church can be worse than those from outside.  You expect attacks from the enemy outside.  It’s the attacks from within, like Judas’ betrayal of Jesus, which absolutely hurt the most.

 9.       You will not be discipled or mentored unless you proactively seek it for yourself.  The people who you want to mentor you are quite busy.  Nobody has ever just seen my potential and gone out of their way to disciple me.  Every mentor I ever had in my life I had to pursue myself.

 10.     You must fight pessimism, bitterness, and even depression.  You will have seasons of doubt regarding God’s  provision, resentment towards people in your church, or possibly even depression.  One of the darkest years of my life was the result of a bad ministry experience.

 11.      Your success in the eyes of others will be measured by how many people you can get in a room.  I wish this weren’t true, but it is.  If your ministry grows, people will praise you.  If it shrinks, they will blame you.  Like it or not, that’s how people think.

 12.     You will never be good enough for some people.  No matter what you do, some people won’t like you.  You will never be good enough to please everyone.  You may also often feel inadequate and unprepared in your own eyes.  You must allow this to drive you to a greater dependence on Jesus.  You are not the savior everyone needs; HE is.

 13.     Your family will be profoundly affected, either good or bad.  Like it or not, your ministry will greatly impact your family.  Some families grow closer to the Lord together in ministry; others grow farther apart.  Ministry will either make your family better or bitter.  Fight bitterness with all your might.

 14.     Without a seminary degree, you will be considered less qualified.  I wish I would have pursued seminary earlier in my ministry.  Not just because of perception, but also because the education has been invaluable to me.  You can argue about whether you need it or not, but you will be judged if you don’t.  And not getting proper education might hold you back.

 15.     Money might be a problem.  Likely, you will struggle financially—especially early on.  Most pastors are not compensated enough.  You must be ready for this going in.  Will you be OK if you can’t buy new clothes, a nice house, or get your wife and kids the things you wish you could?

 16.     You may move many times, especially in certain denominations.  The average stay of a pastor at a church varies.  However, most pastors I know, including myself, have lived in multiple cities working for multiple churches over their lifetime.  The pastor who works in only one church their entire life is admirable and rare.

 17.     When you have to leave a church, you will leave many friends too.  Whether you choose to leave, or the choice is made for you, you will lose more than a job; you lose a church family.  There is always a painful sense of loss when leaving a ministry.  Your wife and kids will also feel it.

 18.     Spiritual warfare is real, and the enemy will attack you and your family in ways you never imagined.  Every pastor can tell you stories of crazy things that happen at the worst times.  If Satan cannot derail you, he will go after your family.  My family always gets attacked before God does something great.  Pray often, and ask others to pray for your family too.

 19.     You will likely feel discouraged, and think about quitting often.  Most pastors call these days Monday.  Even if things go well on Sunday, the enemy will use just one negative comment to bring you down if he can.

 20.    Finally, it will all be worth it!  There is nothing greater than the reward of a life submitted faithfully to Christ.  You may suffer.  It will not be easy, but it will be worth it.  Accepting God’s call to ministry is one of the best decisions I have ever made.  You will have a front-row seat to see many lives changed, marriages healed, and prodigal sons and daughters returning to the faith.  Your ministry impact will outlive your life.  Generations of families will change because you were faithful and did not give up.  If this article sounds too negative, there are also many, many, many reasons I am thankful that I am a pastor.  If this article makes you upset, it should.  Unfortunately, this is the reality most pastors face every day.  Can you relate?  What do you wish someone had told you before becoming a pastor?

 It is my prayer that every pastor will have gleaned some measure of comfort in the knowledge that his/her daily ministry struggles are not entirely unique, and also that every church member will gain additional insight into the ‘life’ of your pastor, and thereby offer more consistent support.  Pray for your pastor.

Sisters and brothers, be continually blessed, and please (above all else) MAKE SURE YOU ARE READY TO MEET OUR SOON COMING KING.  Maranatha!

HOPE BEYOND THIS LIFE

HOPE BEYOND THIS LIFE

 I read an inspirational story about a mother’s tragic loss of her young son.  While it might not be totally accurate (theologically speaking), it is a true portrait of Christ’s profound love for us and the eternal joy that resides on the other side of our earthly existence.  Read it for yourself, and be encouraged to know that there is hope beyond the grave.

 The anxious mother jumped up as soon as she saw the surgeon come out of the operating room.  She said: “How is Jimmy?  Is my little boy going to be all right?  When can I see him?”The surgeon frowned and said, “I’m sorry.  We did all we could, but Jimmy didn’t make it.”

Realizing her greatest fear had just come true, Sally shouted, “Why do young children get cancer?  Doesn’t God care?  Where were you, God, when my son needed you?”

The surgeon asked softly, “Would you like some time alone with your son?  One of the nurses will be out in a few minutes and you can see him before we transport him to the university.”

Sally asked the nurse to stay with her while she said goodbye to her son.  She ran loving fingers through his thick curly hair.  “Would you like a lock of his hair?” the nurse asked.  Sally nodded yes.  The nurse cut a lock of Jimmy’s hair, put it in a plastic bag and handed it to Sally.

The mother said, “It was Jimmy’s idea to donate his body to the university for medical study.  He said it might help someone else.  I said no at first, but Jimmy said, Mom, I won’t be using it after I die.  Maybe it will help some other little boy to spend one more day with his Mom.” She went on, “My Jimmy had a heart of gold. He was always thinking of someone else…always wanting to help others if he could.”

Sally walked out of Children’s Mercy Hospital for the last time, after spending the last six months there.  She put the bag with Jimmy’s belongings on the seat beside her in the car.  The drive home was difficult.  It was even harder to enter her empty house.  She carried Jimmy’s belongings and the plastic bag with the lock of hair to her son’s room.  She started placing the model cars and other things back in his room exactly where he had always kept them.  Then she laid across the bed and, hugging his pillow, cried herself to sleep.

Around midnight, Sally woke up.  Beside her on the bed was a folded letter, which read:

Dear Mom,

I know you’re going to miss me, but don’t think I will ever forget you, or stop loving you, just because I’m not around to say ‘I Love You.’  I will always love you, Mom, and someday we will see each other again.  Until then, if you want to adopt a little boy so you won’t be so lonely, that’s okay with me.  He can have my room and old stuff to play with.  But if you decide to get a girl instead, she probably wouldn’t want the same things boys like so you’ll have to buy her some dolls and girl stuff.

Don’t be sad thinking about me.  This really is a neat place.  Grandma and Grandpa met me as soon as I got here and showed me around, but it will take a long time to see everything.  The angels are so cool.  I love to watch them fly.  And you know what?  Jesus doesn’t look anything like his pictures.  Yet, when I saw Him, I knew who He was right away.  I got to sit on His knee and talk to Him, like I was somebody very important.  That’s when I told Him I wanted to write you a letter, to tell you goodbye and everything.  But I already knew that wouldn’t be allowed here.  Well, you know what Mom?  Jesus handed me some paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter.  I think Gabriel is the name of the angel who is going to drop this letter off to you.  Jesus said for me to give you the answer to one of the questions you asked: “Where was God when my son needed him?”  Jesus said He was in the same place with me as He was the day He died on the cross.  He was right there, as He always is with His children.

Oh, by the way, Mom, no one else can see what I’ve written except you.  To everyone else this is just a blank piece of paper.  Isn’t that cool?  I have to give Jesus His pen back now because He needs it to write some more names in the Book of Life.  Tonight I get to sit at the table with Jesus for supper.  I’m sure the food will be great.

Oh, I almost forgot to tell you.  I don’t hurt anymore because my cancer is all gone!  I’m glad because I couldn’t stand that pain anymore and Jesus said He couldn’t stand to see me hurt so much either.  That’s when He sent the Angel of Mercy to come and get me.  The Angel said I was a Special Delivery!  How about that?

-Signed with love from Jesus and Jimmy

 This emotional story causes me to think about the children who were tragically killed (December 2012) in a Newtown, Connecticut school.  Their loss is not the end of the story, for we always have hope.  In the midst of death, there is life – and a brighter day lies ahead.  If you have recently experienced the loss of a loved one, be encouraged.  And may the comforting presence of the Holy Spirit surround and sustain you and your family.

 Sisters and brothers, be continually blessed, and please (above all else) MAKE SURE YOU ARE READY TO MEET OUR SOON COMING KING. Maranatha!

SOMETIMES

SOMETIMES

 Joel Mbowa, an author from Uganda, shares the following wisdom jewels:

 SOMETIMES we forget that there are people watching us and our actions.

SOMETIMES we forget that we are letters read by others on a daily basis.

SOMETIMES we forget that there are those who take seriously what we sometimes do only casually, and we walk away feeling there has been little or no impact.

SOMETIMES we forget that the power to do good for others lies within us, and whenever we release it we are bound to be affected by the same.

SOMETIMES we are the headings, the chapters, the verses, the lines, the comas, or the periods within life’s letters, all of which are important.

SOMETIMES we ignore the fact that whatever we sow in life is ultimately what we reap.

SOMETIMES…SOMETIMES…SOMETIMES…

My friends, as we traverse this faith-journey called LIFE, we must ever be mindful of our “SOMETIMES.”

Sisters and brothers, be continually blessed and please (above all else) MAKE SURE YOU ARE READY TO MEET YOUR SOON COMING KING.  Maranatha!

MOTIVATE AND MOBILIZE YOURSELF!

MOTIVATE AND MOBILIZE YOURSELF!

 In the words of Jesus Christ, “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” (John 10:10) The Apostle John concurred: “Beloved, I wish above all things that you may prosper and be in health, even as your soul prospers.” (III John 1:2) Since it is apparently the will of Our Father that we Winner-Believers live well-rounded, abundant, productive, healthy and joyful lives, I have reprinted “Seven Self-Motivators” by Brian Tracy for your prayerful consideration. 

 #1 - Get Serious.  Make a decision to go all the way to the top and reach your personal goals.  Up to now you’ve just thought about it.  Others have made the decision to go all the way to the top, and their lives have taken off.  It’s the most extraordinary thing.  Your life is in shadows and in darkness until the moment you decide that “I’m going to be the best at what I do.”  And suddenly you rise into the sunshine, and your life is forever after different – simply wonderful.  Get serious…and don’t fool around anymore.

#2 - Identify Your Limiting Step to Success.  What’s your limiting step?  What’s the one skill area that’s holding you back?  What skill, quality, attitude or action do you need to succeed?  Find out what you need to become good at – the critical step that’s limiting your success today.

#3 - Get Around the Right People.  Get around people with faith and fortitude.  Get around winners.  Get around positive people.  Get around people with goals and plans, people who are going somewhere with their lives and have high aspirations.  In short, get around eagles. ‘You can’t scratch with the turkeys if you want to fly with the eagles.’  So get away from negative and toxic people.

#4 - Take Excellent Care of Your Health.  Take care of your physical and emotional health.  That means a good diet and good exercise.  Get a good night’s sleep so you can be fully rested and ready every morning.

#5 - Use Positive Visualization.  See yourself as the best in your field.  Remember, any improvement in your life begins with a change in your mental pictures.  Visualize and continually see yourself as the best.

#6 - Use Positive Self-Talk.  Talk to yourself positively all the time.  Control your inner dialogue.  What do you say to yourself?  Say, “I’m the best.”  You’re not lying to yourself.   You’re just telling the truth in advance. Because it doesn’t matter where you’re coming from – all that matters is where you’re going.  Talk to yourself the way you want to be, not the way you happen to be at this moment in time.  Remember, you may have gotten where you are today by accident, but where you’re going in the future is by design.

#7 - Take Positive Action.  Get up and get going.  Develop a real sense of urgency.  A sense of urgency is the one thing you can develop that will separate you from everyone else.  Be proactive.  When you get a good idea, do it now.  Only 2% of people in our society apply themselves enough to do this.  You can move yourself into the top 2% by resolving that whenever you have a solid idea, you will do it right now.  And the faster you start to move, the better you get.  And the better you get, the more you like yourself.  And the more you like yourself, the higher your self-esteem is.  And the higher your self-esteem is, the greater your self-discipline.  And as you persist in self-discipline, you will ultimately become unstoppable.

 Thank you Mr. Tracy, for such a positive and proactive action plan.  With your permission, I will add three mission-critical self-motivators for every Winner-Believer: 1) Practice the Presence of God, 2) Meditate on The Word of God, and 3) Decree what the Word declares about you.  Please read the following scriptures for confirmation: I Chronicles 16:27 – Psalm 16:11 - Joshua 1:8 – Job 22:28 – Mark 11:23 – Romans 4:17.  And, as my daughter Kim so often says, Keep It Moving! 

 Sisters and brothers, be continually blessed and please (above all else) MAKE SURE YOU ARE READY TO MEET YOUR SOON COMING KING.  Maranatha!

WHO IS HE?

WHO IS HE?

 As a quiet man walked into a crowded café with a long line of customers, all heads turned as he quickly made his way to the front counter.  The busy restaurant staff was struggling desperately to fulfil the needs of customers.  Discerning their harried circumstance, this man stood up on a chair and called out, “Who will join me in preparing and serving food for all of these people?”  At once, several people emerged from the crowd and raced toward the counter, offering their assistance.  This impromptu leader (let’s call him Joshua) smiled warmly and quickly tutored them on what they needed to know to be effective preparers and servers.  In the middle of all this commotion, a young boy started choking.  Joshua quickly rushed to his aid and dislodged a cookie from the small child’s throat, heroically saving his life.

As the morning rush subsided, Joshua walked outside for a break, where he noticed a homeless man lying on the sidewalk.  Joshua had compassion on the man, and offered him leftover food from the cafe.  The incredibly grateful man thanked Joshua and vowed to return his good deed.  As people learned what Joshua was doing, they surrounded him, and listened intently while he shared valuable lessons about the purpose of life, and how they should live accordingly.  Many people followed Joshua back into the café and the crowd continued to grow in number and curiosity.  Joshua asked the staff how much food they had left and they anxiously informed him that there were only two scones and five croissants remaining.  He assured them that this would not be an issue, and began dividing up the food, placing it on plates to be handed out to the people.  When everyone was fed, the staff came and offered him twelve plates of leftovers.

After Joshua shared his powerful stories, followed by eager questions from the crowd, another man entered.  He had a very stern countenance and disposition. This man (let’s call him Jude) walked straight over to Joshua and inquired demandingly, “Where is your uniform?”  Joshua looked startled for a moment, then he explained that he was merely offering assistance during a time of genuine need.  Jude identified himself as a Health Department Food Safety Officer and summarily proceeded to inspect the café.  All the while, he questioned Joshua’s authority and demanded to know what he had been up to in the café that day.  

 Jude informed the crowd, “This man poses a serious risk to your health and safety!  He has no right to prepare food; he is totally unqualified!”  The crowd murmured quietly as the food inspector continued.  “Not only could he have given you food poisoning, who knows whether he will be able to pay for all this ‘free’ food?” The crowd became terribly agitated.  The inspector scowled at the man, “You may never come into this cafe again!  Now leave!” he demanded.  The people began to push Joshua until he fell to his knees, and then stumbled toward the door. 

 The door closed on him and the people sat there, talking, ignoring and totally rejecting Joshua.  With tears in his eyes, he had left the premises.  Three days later, the café door swung open.  This time, the café owner was standing there, hand in hand with his beloved son, Joshua.  The father simply declared, “This café belongs to my son and me.  Just eat heartily and enjoy your meal; I have already paid your bill!” The people rejoiced as they celebrated the magnanimous generosity of this father and son.  They apologized profusely for the earlier rejection of the son and offered their eternal gratitude for his many kindnesses.  Soon, the good news regarding this free café spread everywhere, and predictably, it was a remarkable hit.  All of their joy and contentment was directly due to the boundless love of a man called Joshua.   

 Is Joshua reminiscent of anyone you’ve encountered?  If not, check out Romans 10:8-10.  If so, are you striving daily to be more like Him?

 Sisters and brothers, be continually blessed and please (above all else) MAKE SURE YOU ARE READY TO MEET YOUR SOON COMING KING.  Maranatha!

CONFORMED TO THE IMAGE OF CHRIST

CONFORMED TO THE IMAGE OF CHRIST

 Have you ever become frustrated at the seemingly slow pace of progress or change in your life?  In this era of ‘microwave mentality,’ it is sometimes challenging to wrap our minds around the fact that GOD WORKS THROUGH PROCESS.  In other words, the changes HE institutes in our lives are often implemented over extended periods, through a multitude of life experiences.  Bottom-line: We cannot always trace God’s hand, but we must consistently trust His heart and plan.

 The story is told of an old man who lived on a farm in the mountains of eastern Kentucky with his young grandson.  Each morning, Grandpa rose early and sat at the kitchen table reading his old worn-out Bible.  His grandson wanted to be just like him and tried to imitate him every way he could.  One day the grandson said, “Papa, I try to read the Bible just like you but I don’t understand it, and what I do understand I forget as soon as I close the book.  So what good does reading the Bible do for me?”

 The grandfather quietly turned from putting coal in the stove and said, “Take this coal basket down to the river and bring back a basket of water.”  The boy did just as he was told, even though all the water leaked out before he could get back home.

 The grandfather laughed and said, “You will have to move a little faster next time,” and sent him back to the river with the basket to try again.

 This time the boy ran faster, but again the basket was empty before he returned home.  Out of breath, he told his grandfather that it was “impossible to carry water in a basket,” and he tried to get a bucket instead.  The old man insisted, “I don’t want a bucket of water; I want a basket of water.  You can do this.  You’re just not trying hard enough,” and he watched from the window as his grandson attempted to please him again.

 But at that point, the boy knew it was impossible, and he just wanted to show his grandfather that even if he ran as fast as he could, the water would leak out before he traveled very far.  The boy scooped the water and ran hard, but when he reached his grandfather the basket was once again empty.  Out of breath, he wheezed, “See Papa, I told you that it’s useless!”

 “So you think it is useless?” the old man said.  “Look down at the basket.”  The young lad examined the basket and for the first time realized that it looked quite different.  Instead of the dirty old coal basket he had first received, the one he held in his hands was now completely clean.

 “Son, that’s what happens when you read the Bible.  You might not understand or remember everything right away, but if you keep on reading, IT WILL SURELY CHANGE YOU…FROM THE INSIDE OUT.”

 That is the work of THE FATHER in our lives.  He changes us from the inside out, gradually transforming us into the image of HIS SON. (Romans 8:29)  Therefore, we must resist the temptation to become exasperated or frustrated by the cadence and content of our change.  Ultimately, we are in the hands of THE MASTER POTTER and we will be fashioned into the finished product that pleases Him and edifies His Kingdom. (Jeremiah 18:1-6)

 The Apostle Paul sums it up succinctly for us: “I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.  And be not conformed to this world: but BE TRANSFORMED BY THE RENEWING OF YOUR MIND, that you may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.” (Romans 12:1-2)

 My friend, let THE CHANGE begin…and let THE CHANGER have His way in THE PROCESS!

Sisters and brothers, be continually blessed, and please (above all else) MAKE SURE YOU ARE READY TO MEET OUR SOON COMING KING.  Maranatha!

OUR PRE-DEATHBED EVALUATION

OUR PRE-DEATHBED EVALUATION

In my early life, I feared death – quite a lot.  That is no longer the case since I continue to make my “calling and election sure” through the grace and mercy of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. (II Peter 1:10)  Admittedly however, I am my own greatest critic when it comes to evaluating and analyzing the God-given purpose for which I was created, and my perception of distance from the same. 

Occasionally, for no particular reason, I find myself contemplating my own demise – which quickly morphs into a rigorous self-examination.  But let me be perfectly clear.  On such occasions, my thoughts seldom center on the views or expectations of others.  Instead, I make every effort to objectively evaluate myself, i.e. my motives, my thoughts, my words, my decisions, my deeds and my accomplishments by comparing and contrasting myself with the immutable teachings found in God’s Word.  This works rather well for me.

Although this might seem to be a rather morbid thought, I suppose that the ultimate examination of life would be to consider carefully how you might ‘SEE’ your life through the lens of some terminal illness, while lying on your deathbed.  Go ahead and ‘try’ it.  After reading the reflective questions below, please close your eyes and prayerfully ponder:

If this hour was the time of my departure, would I be prepared to meet my Maker in peace?

Do my attitudes and my actions reflect the teachings of Christ?

Are there unhealthy or broken relationships I should seek to mend?

Have I walked through life and embraced daily circumstances with boldness?  Have I lived according to the expectations of God, walking with humility and confidence, or have I merely existed within real or imaginary boundaries that others have sought to superimpose on my life?

Am I truly deserving of Heaven’s compensations, or have I put in just enough time and effort to get by? 

Have doubt and fear set limits on my faith and paralyzed my progress?

 Have I sown seeds of joy, mercy, peace and wisdom – or have I been a painful thorn in the flesh?

 Have I served others with love, compassion and consistency?  Are there any infirmed, incarcerated, or indigent persons who are ‘better off’ because of my investment of time, talent and treasure?

Have I done my best with the gifts God endowed at birth and those developed along life’s journey?

 Have I striven to be obedient to His Word, or have I lived as a maverick, going my own way?

 Have I maintained a strong Christ-connection through frequent prayer, intimate worship, systematic Word study and righteous living – and have I been an effective ambassador to those who are lost?

 Have I fully committed and engaged in the community of faith, or have I been an apathetic participant, or have I been a strident critic of church leaders and members?

 Have I walked in loving covenant with my family, spouse, children, parents, siblings and friends?

 Have I learned to forgive and to show kindness, even when it is not reciprocated to me and mine?

 Am I a life-long-learner, or am I a know-it-all?

 Have I focused on empire-building, or establishing the Kingdom of God?

 These questions might lead to others that are far more personal and applicable to your life situation.  I hope so.  While we should never live in fear, our existence must be substantively and seriously examined.  Before any of us can hear our Savior saying “Well done,” we should be able to whisper those same words within our own spirits – with full measures of self-awareness, integrity, transparency, peace and gratitude.

 What does JESUS think?  What would JESUS say?  My friend, it’s all that really matters.

 Sisters and brothers, be continually blessed, and please (above all else) MAKE SURE YOU ARE READY TO MEET OUR SOON COMING KING. Maranatha!