THE TERRIBLE TWO'S

THE TERRIBLE TWO’S

Belinda and I have a granddaughter whom we love dearly.  Her name is Savannah and she is two years old.  Unlike most of our grandchildren, she was relatively slow in developing her ability to communicate verbally.  HOWEVER, once she DID…Savannah immediately became large-and-in-charge in every room she entered.  I repeat: We love her very much and would take nothing in exchange for her place in our family and in our hearts.  But Savannah is caught in the throes of what pseudo-psychologists (like myself) call “the terrible two’s.”  She is peevishly insistent on having her way with all of us, including her two siblings, Sydney (6) and Dylan (9).  Of course, her noisy petulance does not play out very well with them.

Last evening, when Savannah activated that typical agenda of ‘having everything her way,’ I started processing her behavior from a different perspective, with more insight and revelation.  Savannah is much like, indeed JUST LIKE, some members of the institutional church.  After hearing her elders’ words, she systematically selects what directives she wishes to follow.  In this early stage of emotional development, she is completely self-willed and self-absorbed.  It’s ALL about her wishes and needs.

Nevertheless, in the middle of yesterday’s temper tantrum, something quite marvelous occurred.  Belinda picked up Savannah, cradled her gently and whispered softly in her ear, “I love you sweetie.”  Soon Savannah quieted herself and nestled in your grandmother’s compassionate, caring arms.  What a life lesson for me!  Wow!

Right away, I recalled the devotional I wrote yesterday and an insightful comment I later received from a spiritually discerning reader.  While the doctrinal tirade over water baptism (I had described) felt unkind and unwarranted, perhaps my personal approach was entirely wrong.  The pastor from South Africa (referenced above) wisely suggested that we PRAY for those who exhibit behaviors that seem aggressive or divisive to us.  His words convicted me.  “The differences will always be there,” he said, “but I pray they never cloud fellowship and the gospel.”  Profound wisdom.  Instead of becoming angry or lashing back, I (we) should prayerfully seek to understand the speaker and to adjust our own attitude(s). 

The Apostle Paul advised the Church of Galatia accordingly:

Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, CONSIDERING YOURSELF lest you also be tempted.  Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:1-2, NKJV).

Belinda clearly modeled the way forward.  Even though our beloved Savannah is presently ensconced in “the terrible two’s,” we genuinely love her, without reservations or conditions.  Dylan and Sydney are far too young to comprehend the emotional nuances that undergird their baby sister’s behavior.  I do not wish to model their (understandable) immaturity in my dealings with people who ‘appear’ to be unkind or contentious.  Rather, I resolve to purposefully emulate my wonderful wife’s wisdom and compassion.  So the next time I interact with someone who seems strident or difficult, I will respond with a radical difference – with much more compassion, with intercessory prayer and with a real awareness of my own faults and shortcomings.  Who knows?  They just might be experiencing a spiritual version of “the terrible two’s,” and they could be in dire need of having a loving adult in their room.  Sisters and brothers, be continually blessed.