MAKING THE MOST OF PARENTHOOD (Part III)

MAKING THE MOST OF PARENTHOOD (Part III)

Sometimes it’s wise to gain the insight of professionals to enhance our parenting skills.  The American Psychological Association recommends seven practical strategies to maximize opportunity for success in the raising of our children. I’ll share the remaining three (and my own) today:

Prevent misbehavior.

Dr. John Lutzker, director of the Center for Healthy Development at Georgia State University, advises against the use of time-outs.  Instead, he teaches parents to plan and structure activities to prevent unacceptable behavior.  Specifically, parents should (1) plan ahead to prevent problems from arising, (2) teach children how to cope effectively with demanding situations, (3) find ways to help children

stay engaged and active when they might otherwise become bored or disruptive.  According to Dr. Lutzker, “We've found in our work over the past 20 years that if you do a good job teaching parents planned activities training, there’s no need for time-outs.”

Take care of yourself first.

Parents receive some of the best parenting advice every time they take off on an airplane, i.e. “If the cabin loses pressure and you must put on an oxygen mask, put one on yourself first before you help your child.”  All too often in American households, all of the oxygen is going to the children.  Yet the research makes it clear that children are negatively affected by parental stress.  By taking care of yourself, you avoid injecting your own emotional issues into the lives of your children.  Overprotective parenting sometimes results from unresolved trauma from the childhood of parents.  We must deal with this to navigate it, or we may unintentionally inject it into our children.

Make time.

All too often the one-on-one time parents offer their children is the time that's left over after all other obligations have been met.  This means that we often treat relationships—which are like orchids—like cactuses.  Then, when the orchid wilts or has problems, we tend to think that there's something wrong with the orchid.  To avoid this outcome, parents should spend at least one hour a week of one-on-one quality time with each child, doing nothing but paying attention to and expressing positive thoughts and feelings toward him or her.

MY PERSONAL INSIGHT: SEEK BIBLICAL WISDOM AND SPIRITUAL DIRECTION.

The Holy Writ contains practical solutions for every one of life’s challenge.  And we should be conscientious about petitioning for divine direction.  Wise and loving parents make a strong commitment to pray (consistently and faithfully) for the welfare and health of their children.

Sisters and brothers, be continually blessed, and please (above all else) MAKE SURE YOU ARE READY TO MEET OUR SOON COMING KING. Maranatha!